Do you ever feel that your just going through the motions in your life? Like you’re in it, but not really living it? The more I talk with others, both as a counselor and as a friend, the more aware I am of how common this is. However, most people don’t set out to just “survive” life. Often times, it happens gradually. You may have been burned in a relationship, hurt by a friend, disappointed in your stage of life, unsatisfied in your job, struggling in your marriage or even feel abandoned by God. Whatever the reason, whether out of fear or self-protection, you may find yourself living life on auto-pilot or just “going through the motions.”
When we experience the pain of this life, the feelings of loss, disappointment, fear and rejection (to name a few), we have a choice: either we can choose to feel and validate our experiences without giving them the power to define us, or we can choose to develop strategies to cope without having to endure the painful feelings. Coping can include ignoring or resigning our hopes and desires, numbing our feelings, lashing out at others, building emotional walls or simply trying to be who others want us to be– usually at the expense of ourselves. Coping is ultimately not healthy and usually the catalyst for the beginning stages of living life on auto-pilot.
The thing is, when we live life on auto-pilot, we often compromise what is most important to us. Whether it’s your values, your voice, your boundaries or your sense of self, something inherently you becomes lost in the process. What starts out as a way to protect ourselves can quickly become the thing that robs us of truly being ourselves and actively engaging in our own lives and relationships. Choosing to cope, although the seemingly easier option, always comes with a great cost.
I invite you to join me on this blog journey. Together, we will explore the intrinsic pieces of ourselves that make up the whole of who we are– spiritual, interpersonal, emotional, relational, sexual, mental and physical. Like a wagon wheel with a broken spoke, if one of these parts is hurting or disregarded, the ride can be quite bumpy. Healing and change begin with awareness of the truth (being honest with ourselves) and having courage to be real and vulnerable in the process. Speaking from experience, being an active participant in your own life is not always easy or fun (I often tell my clients, “it’s not puppies and rainbows and cake-pops!”). In fact, it can be painful and raw and downright exhausting at times. But it is good. The quality of life, awareness, authenticity and self-confidence that results is worth the pain of the process.
Webster dictionary defines “revive” as “a verb meaning to make (someone or something) strong, healthy and active again.” To me, this brings great hope. What was once lost can be found again, and something that never was can be created. Revive literally means “to bring back to life.”
Are there areas of your life that need to be revived? Are you wanting to make a change, to start truly living your life as the person God created you to be, but you just don’t know where to begin? At Revive, my goal is to empower clients to heal from past wounds, grow into the person they aspire to be and thrive in their lives and relationships. You can actively live your life as your true self. It might be scary and painful at times, and it may be a slow process to get there, but as someone who is on this journey as well, I promise it’s worth it. If you have any questions about counseling or would like to know more, please contact me. I’d love to hear from you!